


Fight Me On That

by themadtilde



Category: The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: AU, Coffe shop AU, Fighting, Flirting, Humor, M/M, Saphael, and punching, enemies to lovers-ish, raphael has his own ways ok, sweet bantering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-28 07:41:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8437087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themadtilde/pseuds/themadtilde
Summary: one day im gonna say "fight me!" and someone's just gonna fuckin deck me





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hi.  
> Um.  
> What do you say when you've been gone for five months?  
> Well, I did post an AriDante fic a few weeks ago, but nothing from the TMI-fandom.  
> I had a huge authors block. The worst I've ever experienced. I looked up prompts and ideas. I wrote freely. I watched new series. I drew fanart. Nothing worked. Everything I wrote sounded like shit.  
> So, sorry if this is rushed, sloppy, anything.  
> Y'all know how it works; english ain't my native language, there might be spelling mistakes etc.

Simon was literally boiling with rage. Here stood Raphael Santiago - okay, hot but also very bad-bad boy - before him, and was telling him Gandalf's better than Dumbledore?

"Have you even read Harry Potter?" Simon exclaimed, drawing the attention of everyone in the half-empty café. From behind the counter, Alec stood with his apron with the cafés logo on. He was holding a wet plate in his hand and tried to dry it with a towel, but his attention was on Simon and Raphael. From the kitchen, Isabelle poked out her head.

"Uhm, Simon ..." Clary began slowly, from where she sat opposite him at the table. Without looking at her, Simon held up his hand to silence her. Clary kept silent, but bit her lip and glared at him.

"If you must know. I've read all seven books, watched all eight movies, and also read the sequel," Raphael informed him from where he stood, looking down at Simon with a smirk on his face. 

"And neither of them made anything better. I must tell you, Gandalf beats Dumbledore long way."

Raphael's eyes were strangely black. Simon did his best to stare into them - to make himself appear confident, and superior and cool. But his gaze slowly trailed downwards - to Rapahel's very expensive-looking jacket, and his dark red shirt that was the tiniest bit too short, so a bit of pale skin peeked out. Before his eyes could land on Raphael's shoes, the boy continued and Simon's eyes darted up.

"And also, Dumbledore's kinda wimpy. Almost always speaks in riddles, and every time Harry asks something, he just replies with a new stupid metaphor or something like that."

Taking a quick look at Raphael's shoes - okay, very black and very shiny - before looking up to meet his gaze, Simon said with what he hoped was his badass-voice:

"Well, not everyone can be as perfectly flawless and gorgeous as you!"

He blinked. Raphael goggled at him. Shit, what did he just say? And did he just compare Dumbledore - an old man with beard and wrinkles and God knows what - to Raphael? Clary gaped at him. Alec looked like he was about to drop his plate.

"As you believe yourself to be!" Simon quickly added.  _Nice save, Lewis,_ he thought smugly to himself.

Raphael made a sound between a snort and a laugh.

"That's true," he said. "Although I'm not nearly as self-righteous as Magnus, I do believe I know more than you, Lewan."

"Lewis."

"Oh, sorry."

Simon sighed and closed his eyes. "Did you just come here to fight about Gandalf and Dumbledore?"

Raphael shrugged. "Well, someone must tell you the straight fact that Gandfalf beats that old wimp Dumbledore so hard that Dumbledore wouldn't even have a chance if they were to duel."

Simon's anger, that slowly had stopped boiling, quickly flamed up again.

"Oh yeah?" he hissed heatedly, slamming his cup down on the table and standing up to be eye-to-eye with Raphael. "Well, fight me on that!"

Clary made a sqeaking sound, and Raphael's eyes widened, just a little. And then, before Simon could really comprehend what he just had said, he was lying on the floor with Raphael hovering over him, and he felt a throbbing pain in his skull.

Disoriented, he moved slightly, feeling if all his limbs were still in place. Clary's head also poked into his line of vision, staring at him with an open mouth. "Dear God, Simon, are you okay?"

"I barely touched you," Raphael pointed out. Simon blinked - his glassed had slid off. Sitting up, his hands started searching for his glasses. Raphael straightened, and Simon felt even smaller now when he was sitting on the floor.

"Um, I think so ...?" he said to answer Clary's question.

Clary scowled and withdrew her head.

"Here." Something swam into his vision - Raphael's hand. And he was holding Simon's glasses. Simon snatched them quickly, put them on and glared up at the smirking boy.

"If you barely hit me, then why does it feel like my head's about to explode?"

Raphael made that weird laughing-snort sound again.

"Well, you told me to fight you. And I did. It was a light blow, really. I could've taken you out completely."

"Oh yeah?" Simon struggled to stand up, and to his surprise, Raphael offered his hand. Simon swatted it away, and stood up (not so gracefully) with help of the table. He looked around the café. Alec had actually dropped his plate, and it was lying in pieces around the counter. Isabelle wasn't even trying to hide anymore - she had come up behind Alec and stared at Simon.

"Um," Simon said, suddenly desperate to get everyone's attention off him. "Eh, okay. Fine. You win. Gandalf's better."

Raphael's smirk grew even bigger. "I know," he said. "But you don't sound entirely convinced."

"Because I'm not," Simon pointed out. "I just don't want you to deck me again."

"I didn't deck you," Raphael groaned, suddenly sounding exasperated. "Really, I just touched your skull with a little more force than a two year old hits a toy with a stick, and you passed out on me."

"I didn't pass out. If I did, I would be way more confused now. And dizzy."

"Not necessarily. Some people can wake up from fainting with just a slight, nauseous feeling and still not almost fall over on a table when standing up."

"Oh, so now you're suddenly expert at health and sickness, too?"

Raphael lowered his voice, so only Simon (and maybe Clary) could hear. "If you actually bothered to get to know me, you would know a lot more about me than what the rumours say. I'm not all hard and cold and superior."

It took a few seconds for Simon to understand what Raphael was saying.

"Wait, you mean like, you want me to get to get to know you? And me get to know you?" he said loudly.

Raphael closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. "Dios, you're so slow," he muttered. "Look, I'm sorry for punching you. I didn't intend to from the beginning. But I just have to tell you ... Gandalf's better."

Simon turned and looked at Clary. She stared a little doe-eyes at the scene before her, but when Simon gave her an urgent look, she quickly smiled and did a thumbs-up.

Looking back at Raphael, he said slowly: 

"Fine, I'll try to meet you without wanting to rip your head off. But only if you agree that Dumbledore is a badass too."

"We're going to have to work on that."

**Author's Note:**

> Look, I apologize for the shitty ending. I'm just so tired right now - it's twenty past twelve in the night and I woke early today.  
> Do please leave comments! I really hope to continue writing - I hope my Authors block is over. I need some support here.
> 
> Thank you all for reading. I never get used to the feeling of people reading my works.


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